Jeans are a joke, and leggings ARE pants!

Ok ladies, raise your hands if you’ve tried on 10 different brands of jeans in the same size, only to find they all fit differently? Hey now, you in the back of the class, don’t hide your head in shame, I KNOW you have been through this!

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I mean, we have all been through the same sob story, again and again: You take that hard earned cash to your favorite shopping spot ready to shred the shopping racks with your fashionista style! Maybe you will grab a cute top with some matching accessories, or perhaps that spring dress is calling out to you in a whiny voice “Pick me”! 

And then. You pass. The jeans.  I mean, you weren’t GOING to try on jeans, since your last experience included cussing so loud in the dressing room you made a baby cry….. But, maybe , just maybe, this time would be different. I mean, you had a salad this week, you probably lost a whole pound! And those adorable stonewashed boyfriend jeans, with the rolled cuff and perfect, random rips throughout are calling out to you” Try me on, it won’t hurt”. You snatch them off the rack with fervor, grabbing 4 other styles while your at it. “Why not”! you tell yourself, ” “I’m in an optimistic mood, I mean they are all my size AND  I held them up to me so they should fit great”.

10 minutes later, heard from across the universe” WHYYYYYYY”!!!!!!!!

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The truth of the matter is designers perceive sizes differently. So while one pair of jeans, pants, or whatever could decide that my size 12 pants should have a  34 inch waist and 39 inch hips(thank you!) another designer could decide that I must be a 32 inch waist and 36 inch hip if I am a size 12. Then there is this awful thing called “Vanity Sizing” that has become ever present. Popular thought has it that women (and men!) are more likely to buy certain clothing if the  size is smaller than how they perceive themselves, so many brands have resorted to labeling larger waist/hip measurements as smaller sizes, hence the sizing confusion.I. .mean. for .F. Sake. REALLY?!?! 

Look, I am going to get serious for a second( a rarity!) and tell you that I don’t giving a flying bad word what size my jeans say just so long as I am able to find a pair that fits my curvy , petite frame. Is it so hard to ask for some custom jeans up in here! Word. Ya’ll are gorgeous, and I wish we could rip out all size labels and stop judging others and ourselves for this misgivings of these stupid designers. I seriously need to start designing Jeans in my line…hmmm!

Ok last thought on jeans, please do not ever ever ever ever ever ever, a million more times ever wear these:

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If I catch you wearing these I’ll be forced to rip ’em off you and leave you naked, crying in the streets. For realsies.

And let me leave you with one last word or two of wisdom:

Leggings ARE pants!!!!! Nyuh Nyuh Nyuh!

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XOXO Fans,

Dramatic Erin

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